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The memory of my fathers battle with cancer still haunts me to this day. It pained me to see the cancer slowly alter his physique, the once healthy and active man in his prime slowly being whittled down, immobilized by pain. Ever the optimist and fighter, even when being diagnosed six months ago, dad never broke down and serenely told us that we would all pull through this crisis together. Thinking back it may just have been his way of preparing us for what was to come.

After enduring months of painful radiation and cocktails of drugs, dad was left a mere shadow of the man he used to be. The treatment had prematurely aged and weakened him, if that wasnt enough the doctor announced that the treatments were ineffective and dads condition had deteriorated, the cancer had spread to his liver. This was the straw that broke the camels back for my dear mother. She lost her composure and broke down in tears, we all did except for dad. He never flinched, as cool as a cucumber just another hurdle in his way. Dad seemed more concerned about us than himself.

Days passed as the tedium of life in a hospital ward took over, we all took turns to take care of dad. One day as I was settling into my routine of watching television, I heard dads broken voice asking hoarsely Son I was thinking, remember the present you gave methe photo mug. Can you look for it? My mind blurred for a moment then I remembered, I had given the mug to him as a present after my graduation. A photo of us together was printed on it along with the words Thanks Dad written boldly in front. Dad told me where to find it in the house and I went to get it. As I held the mug in my hand I could feel a swell of emotion well up in me as I recalled the story behind the mug.

The photo was taken during my graduation ceremony. The convocation was the culmination of so many things to both me and my dad, the end of my studying days, my rite of passage to the working world, his acceptance of me as a man and his joy at successfully raising a graduate. The joy we felt together as a family was unbounded and I could feel dads pride at watching his son graduate. To commemorate the occasion at the urging of my mother, dad and I had our photo taken together. This may seem normal to most people, but dad was never one for photos preferring to take the pictures rather than be in them. Thus it was one of those rare photos that we shared together on what would be the happiest day of my life. A few days later as the euphoria of the convocation was just starting to die down, I decided to immortalize our moment together on a personalized photo mug at a stall I spied at the mall which also did a lot of custom military coffee mugs and so on. There we were pictured grinning widely on the front of a coffee mug, what would dad make of this I thought.

I am not what you would call a giving person, I regret that now and have changed somewhat. But I think that only helped to heighten dads joy at receiving my gift. He too was silent for a moment as I broke his daily routine of television watching not knowing what to make at first of the mug that was thrust into his hands. He uttered the words thanks then turned back to his show, it was only later that I noticed him smiling fondly as he fingered it. In the glow of the fading evening light, I realized that he truly appreciated the gift. When the son finally gives instead of receiving then he has begun to be a man. The personalized photo mugs was my first significant gift to dad, I remember thinking, why didnt  I get him a fancy hand phone or a gold chain instead, but now looking back the mug with the two of us in a goofy embrace was more than adequate.

As I passed the personalized reunion mug to dad in the hospital ward a feeling of dj vu overcame me as dad flashed a smile as held the mug, the exact smile he was sporting as I saw him fingering the mug that night so many years ago. Dad looked at me and began to speak Son. Of all the things in life, of all my triumphs, accomplishments and all my awards and trophies. There are only two things that matter, one is that I met your mom and two is that we raised you up to be a fine young man. The day you graduated I knew we had done a good job...Im proud of you soon and always will be. I couldnt stop the tears even if I wanted to so I just stood there like an idiot and smiled and dad smiled back at me. I knew that we were saying goodbye to each other.

My father ultimately loss the battle with cancer a fortnight later but he won the war. The stars dimmed just a little and the world spun just a little slower the day he sailed away on that golden winged ship. A part of me died that day but I know that a part of him still lives in me. I have kept the mug safely in the closet where he kept it safely out of harms way, it makes me sad and happy to look at it now like bittersweet chocolate. Dad may have been proud of me as a son, but I am even prouder to have had such a father as him.